We made it!

Well, mom decided this is her blog so she's going to take it back. She let me write for a while, but there are things she feels that I don't understand, so she said I don't have to do it anymore. Back to you, mom!

Our first day of daycare was a success. Jenna made it through, and even more shocking was that so did I! Jay & I dropped her off at 8:15 and I picked her up at 3:15. I was lucky to get to leave work early. Then I logged in from the couch while Jenna took a little nap next to me. I will probably do that a lot this week and maybe next week because it's so hard for me not to think about her there! Jenna was fine--they put her in the swing, fed her, changed her diaper, and probably held her some. My plan was to visit her at lunch, but I decided it would be way too hard. Not for her--for me! She wouldn't really know the difference, but didn't want to cry again like I did this morning. I tried to prepare myself for this mentally so it wouldn't be so hard, but I had a pit in my stomach and I just felt like a horrible mom leaving her there. I cried before we left the house, at the daycare, after we left the daycare, and at work. Then I came home for lunch and cried more because I was looking at her stuff but she wasn't there. I even cried on the way home when I drove past the daycare place and knew that she was there. I kept telling myself she's just at daycare. She's not in the hospital, she's alive and well, and probably happier there than she would be sitting at home with me. When I left work, I was giddy. I was so excited to get her! I couldn't wait to pick her up and hug her. She obviously didn't acknowlege that she knew who I was, but she let me hug her a lot and she was being very sweet.

I am so glad we got through this first day. I don't really know that tomorrow will be any easier, but at least I know more what to expect and I can kind of think about what they're doing with her all day. When I get to the point that I don't cry anymore when I drop her off, life will be good! Now I'm going to quit blogging and get some baby girl lovin'!